Story alli long xa hai but it is worth it
I’m 19 (M).So it all started when i was in 3 class. My dad was transferred to Bhairahawa Airport. My mom and young brother had to go with my dad because he needed help there to stay. I started living with grandparents. I started having anxiety and i didn’t even know i was having anxiety until i was in grade10. I got chance to meet my parents after 2.5 years when i was in grade 6. While i was with my grandparents i got attached to poetry as my grandfather was a book lover and had many collection of famous novel and poems. Everything was fine until i was in 12th. A very close friend of mine died in a bike crash. He was the only person whom i trusted blindly and after 3 months my one relative died who was really close. Losing 2 aspect of life started giving me anxiety again.
I was a type of guy who was a massive flirt and had many girlfriend and sidechick.
I also started writing poetry when i was in 10th and i got many girlfriend because of my flirting nature and poetry.
Class 12th final exam was starting and i met a girl online. She was from Kathmandu and I’m from Pokhara. I was starting to feel a little better after i met her. After 12 exam completed i started doing PTE (IELTS for those who don’t know PTE). She was also doing same.
After i got along with that Kathmandu ko girl. I stopped talking to other girl as i felt she is the one for me.
During the time i started taking cookery class at morning from 6 to 11 and doing partime job from 12 to 5 and reading for PTE from 6 to 7:30 mainly. I didn’t have a bike or scooter. So i travelled by bus everywhere.
Things started to degred again the money my parents saved for me to go abroad was in Sahakari(सहकारी) and a person took all the money and scammed us. The amount was about 35 lakh. I started panicking and at the same time my relationship started to degred. I was busy all day and leave her a message at morning as as soon i get up. She used to reply it and nothing. If I’m busy for 1 or 2 day and didn’t message she had no curiousness about me. Everytime i message her and one day i asked why don’t you message me and just reply? She used to say ki ‘ message garnai lako theye, timile gareu!’ She gave me that excuse for about 3 4 times earlier also
I was already going through so many things loosing 2 people close to me, got scammed and lost all money. And she never cared about me. I was feeling angry as I’m really short tempered person. I deleted chats in viber because those days i deactivated my fb. And guess what she never messaged me again. After 3 4 weeks her bday arrived and i wished her by messaging. All she said was ‘thanks you’. And we never talked but she used to post stories about getting hurrt and somehow i started thinking she’s posting about me indirectly. The girl I’ve mentioned earlier i got attached to her was started to feel I’m in love woth her. I used to rap in poetry stlyle during that time. I thought of gifting her a mixtape of 4 songon her birthday. I wrote a rap poetry for her (a mixtape of 4 songs) she used to like my poetry with rap format. I wrote 1st song about how we met online, 2nd song was about flirting phase and getting to know each other, 3rd song was about we started liking each other. But i didn’t got time to complete my 4th song which i wrote imagining future ith her. And guess what all the songs i wrote we’ve gone through but the fourth song was never completed so we do.
I gave my PTE examination and applied for Australia. Submitted fee somehow but my grandfather got pneumonia and doctor said it was covid and i again started feeling tensed because he is really close to me since i have spent my all childhood with him. He was the only person left whos was really close to me. I booked flight and went to hospital directly and stayed in hospital for 2 weeks and returned back Pokhara.
My girlfriend went Canada. I saw her story walking at evening in Canada. My heart got another hit. Because when we were in start of relationship we confirmed that even if we didn’t last long we will inform each other about going abroad.
Roughly 2 weeks passed my dad fell down and broke his arm and had to perform operation and put a metal rod(titanium) which didn’t needed to be removed. Now, again one family relative passed away. Although he was not that close to me but my family was.
I applied my visa for Australia and was waiting for visa. Another incident happened the rod which was placed in my dad’s arm had to be removed because the screw holding it got loosen up and it is going to cause a problem. I was still hoping i am going get visa and can fullfil everything i’ve wanted. But i got my visa rejected.
That day 10th August 2023 my heart literally shattered. Still didn’t had a single tear in eyes.
A week ago my friend came to Pokhara and we met and went for having drink at night. I drank 4 beer and 3 pegs of rum and started feeling a bit dizzy. I rested my head while i was sitting and A drop of tear went down from my eyes.
I literally cried after 11 years. Before i cried when my mom had to go Bhairahawa with my brother and dad. And last i got tear that day i was drunk.
Now i feel like I’m failed person. I don’t have many friends, i lost my love of life, my 2 close people. And still everytime people say ‘ tero life dhukka xa, talai kei ko tension xaina, talai ta mauj xa hai’ but the truth is nobody knows full story.
Kei vannu xa vaney comment box khali xa
Mailey dherai kura yesma vaneko xaina kinaki story lastai lamo vayo .
View on r/Nepal by Dark_Warrior01
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First. I wouldnt call her the love of your life. Thats a big word to call a girl who doesnt care about you. Ups and downs happen in everyones life. Get up and start over. You cant change the past but you can your future.
Stay strong bro, everything will be fine.💗
Nothing is stronger than a small hope that doesn’t give up and being human we tend to have failures in life and as it goes what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Cheers
Dude your life is okey. You are not a failure. Life ma ups and downs huncha bhanchan. You are in a down now.
Australia ko visa naayera life sakincha?? Timro emotions valid cha tara naive cha. Do your bachelors here and go after that to Australia. It’s not a big deal. Other about your anxiety please visit psychiatrist and get into physical fitness and meditation.
Resilience and positivity is a key to life. I am 10 years older than you and I find nothing relating to failure in your life. Sahakari bhageko ta timro galti kasari bhayo ra?
Ohhh how I wish I was 19 with the maturity of a 29 year old.
Please look for new options and take care of yourself and your family.
Life is Strange
I thought I was the only one whose life is fucked up. Us Moment Bro. I can totally understand you. Better life ahead. Peace Out.
I mean what was that , I thought what could be worse than mine , i also have a visa rejection , money hold in share market which will never recover but still your one is really bad , I hope you for better future.
Bro you are so young and your whole life is infront of you. Why do you give a shit about a girl you barely saw in person. You’ll meet so many girls in the years to come. Focus on yourself and your goals. Take care of loved ones but don’t drown in sorrow. Everything else will come naturally. Speaking from experience
Bhai, listen what ever has happened the arrow has been shot , you can’t change the karma that you have shot through your bow. But now you have realised what life is , the intensity and flavours of emotions come hard be it good or bad.
I can’t give you a solution for what is happening to you , but Bhai I can say this , give some time everyday to some kind of dhyann.
Like self reflection, but go to a place of power , you don’t even need to close your eyes , just take a note pad and pen and sit down and write down every feeling you are going through and why you are going through it.
You can drown your sorrows and go through it , but that will lead to a deep root of long term frustration that won’t be solved by addiction.
Learn to use Ur chit Shakti and overcome what ever load has been on your mind. You are blessed to live in Nepal. Stay strong and learn to channel your emotions for the better now. Don’t build habits that will drown you in a bitterness that will affect everyone around you and the worst , commit spiritual suicide.
Peace bro
stay strong bro!
Try not to think a lot. Read self help books and pry that you will get visa to go abroad.
Sometimes, getting away from all the craziness helps settle too.
But don’t think a lot. Take one day at a time. And think positive.
Good luck
Hune kura bhayera chadcha marna lekheko Cha bhaye marincha Tyo marne Bachne tension na liu bro thoughts haru aucha life predictable bhayo bhane majja ayena ni unpredictable ho life jasko j ni huna sakcha baki ta katha le k magcha Tei hudai jancha just go with the flow
you should cry more often. it helps
Sympathy to you . Stay strong time will heal everything. Tara I would share an opinion on your relationship.
You said you used to have many girlfriends and even sidechicks. Have you even considered their feelings? Maybe they were referring you as the love of their life and you only played with them.
But that maybe your ignorance or foolish action some years back. Maybe she(Canada gako wala) got to know about your past and started to think you as red flag. Perhaps, she got to know about it through one of your close friend who envied your relationship.
At the end of the day, you will certainly find the real love of your life.
All the things will be sorted bro, death is the part of a life. One day we all will also die. I understand your sadness. And about that girl? I am also same like you, was flirtatious, but then a girl came made me feel like we are in relationship and boom!! She didn’t even recognized my existence. These type of girls are existing nowadays and calling themselves victim. Freak these girls!! Auta hasdo kheldo kta lai ni purai latoo banaidinxa yr.😵💫But slowly moveon huwa. Takes time but You will know how to cope up with pain. Ani crying ma chai, I had always Cried looking towards sky in the alone night, chaat ma. Looking the stars.😮💨
Damn bro, Your story makes me appreciate my life more than ever. I can never thank my mom enough for what she has done.
Your girl sounds exactly like my ex. Turns out she had someone else in her life that’s why she couldn’t care much about me. I believe it is the same in your case. Time heals everything. I used to think exactly like you. But you will get over her one day. Don’t waste your time on someone like her. You seem like a very talented and creative guy. Stay positive and move ahead in life. I know its easier said than done but what choice do we have?
The thing I learned in usa was being the best entrepreneur.
I can have $0 dollar and can earn $100k a year. Be skillful. I have a friend in Nepal that makes $7-8lakh a month. It’s all about being skillful not pity full
In Nepal,
Photographers -35-50 thousands a day
Hair saloon (hair stylist)-30-50 thousands
Event decor-15-100k
You can drive taxi and make a Decent living too
I know a tutor that makes 2 lakh a month in Nepal too
If you are good on any thing, start right away.
19 (M) 🤣
Be strong one every thing will be alright. Ani kti ko case I don’t think sabai usko fault ho mero ex ko ni timiro jastai bani thiyo msg ko reply late aauni teti nabolni vaye ni usle Pani ta sochdo ho yetikai flirt hanirako ho ki serious ho vanera. Mero case ma ni testo huna thaley paxi we break up ani malai achamana Pani lagena maile break up Vanda usle kina vanera nasochda so think about it it’s my point of view
you dont seem to have a real problem , these all are in your head
Get lost
Tldr?
aww man you going thru it 😪
dude everything happens for a reason , Aele garo huncha taki pachi ramro hos vanera nita ho .
I know you’ll do it, and bro, don’t stop. Life will drag you to dust, but make sure you get up with a smile. Stay strong, brother. You have a long way to go.
Be careful of those girls bro
This shall too pass.
Sab thik huncha.Samaya lai samaya deu
The only person who can save you is Marcus Aurelius.
Afno paisa le kamayera ja bhai 😂 be a man.
I am happy for you or sorry that happened. anyway too long didn’t read