Hello everyone. So I’ll come to the point and don’t mind me if this becomes long. So I got into a college ani like mero course ma chai there are prolly 13,14 people only in my sem. My degree is kinda unheard type ko ani rarely people get into it. So I joined college 1 month late pani so I didn’t know whom to talk to or which group to get into. Mero life ma kaile yesto without friends wala scenario nai aako thena aile samma. But, college ma I got into a group ani tyo group ma 4 people had already bonded with each other later I got in ani so obviously I was the odd one out. 2 jana besties ani arko 2 jana besties since +2 ani 4 of them getting along well. I felt really weird and I rarely go to college. I get my materials ani notes ani study at home. Those kids that went to college everyday had got like 4 backs ani I was able to do well going to college 2,3 days a week and studying at home. First sem ma I went to college nearly everyday but since I had absolutely 0 friends and this was my first time literally having 0 fuckin friends I just didn’t know how to cope and stopped going to college. Yk looking at the window or looking at your phone all the time, sitting in a corner and not knowing what to do. No one talks to me and I do approach people, last time I approached someone heck that girl said it straight to me, “timi sanga boleko haina kina reply gareko, timi chup basa aau *a girls name* jaam”. I literally have no one to talk to ani I get anxious. Imagine talking to “a” person? Literally not me cuz lmao no one talks to me. So I pulled out tyo celebrity in the class/quiet kid that rarely comes to college wala persona xD.
This is kasto draining ani I’m taking a break from everything now. Literally no social medias at all. I just downloaded reddit to rant. I’m not talking to anyone I knew before entering this college too. I’m just not talking and avoiding everything. My mental health has been terrible ani my battle with depression is not sth new. With all this idk what to do. I feel exhausted and skipping college all the time isn’t great for me either. How do I survive these 4 years? 🙂