We live in a nuclear family. It’s been more than a year since my grandmother started living with us ,which is temporary. She lives away with her other son in place (say place A), which is very far. The place she permanently resides in is very remote and my father left that place in his early 20s for further studies and eventually settled down here (say place B). Ever since she stepped foot in this house, quarrels started in our home. She is well known for saying unnecessary gossip to my father against me and my mother, especially my mother. She sits in her room and talks with her daughters and says things against us. My “fupus”, who used to be very close with my mother, have completely shunned my mom. She is also the reason behind the lack of communication between my father and my so called fupus. She is also the one who started a feud between her sons regarding property matters. She sold some of her personal assets and tells other people that we don’t provide her enough money which is very unture. My father always gives her 4-5k when she has to go somewhere. Also, she has accumulated about 30-40 thousand from her senior-citizen and widow allowance and she refuses to spend a single penny from her bank account. Furthermore, She “complains” to her daughters that we are not feeding her good food and states ” gu khaaye jasari basexu ma” after eating dui kachauraa khasi ko jhol three times a week. Me and my mother cannot even sit together because she will tell others “aama chhori milera kura kaatexan”. She has problem with everything my mother does. She can’t stand seeing my parents together. She spends hours with my father in my parents’ bedroom after dinner at night despite my father’s suggestion of going to bed early. She rushes to disturb any of the moments my parents have together. She has made every living moment hell for us. My father is well-known about these tactics of his mother and even he is having a very hard tolerating her at this point but staying silent saying. Dikka vaisakyo k aba ta. Malaai ta maanxe dekhdaa ni ghin laagera aauxa. Jaile ni fulera baseko xa. Sabai jana baseko thau maa aayera mukh fulaayera aarko patti farkera basni. Chhito gaye ni hunthyo jasto vaisakyo. Aattisake ma ta ekdam.
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Mero hajuraama sanga mitini lagaidinu paryo, I think they were separated in kumbh ko mela decades back.
She’s doing this because your family is tolerating her. I would suggest you 3 to come together and do things that annoy her and make her reluctant to move out. Jhan aama chori sangai huna Parcha aba.
search for another grandfather…
My hajur aama cried when I was born cuz ma kti ho. And literally told people lai abha bau ko sampatti khane vai k chhori janmeko hola. 🤣😭
Some moms see their son as their husbands and think other women are a threat. It’s called emotional incest. Google it if you want.
These boomers get orgasm from the gossips and verbal fights…
it comes down to your father now. will he allow his mother to steamroll his wife and daughter or grow a spine.
Sadistic, she probably gets pleasure from seeing other people in pain
sis is that you ?? mero didi ho ??
She is from the generation where gossips were the primary means to bond together.
get granny outta yr abode ASAP!
yeah, its tough when a family member you live with is a POS. Makes every living day hell. peace to you
Typical very typical ! Lastai frustration ho… Kahile kahi ta lagcha , West jasto caring home ma rakhna paye ni hunthyo !
> My father is well-known about these tactics of his mother and even he is having a very hard tolerating her at this point. She has made every living moment hell for us. My father is well-known about these tactics of his mother and even he is having a very hard tolerating her at this point
I thought I was repeating the same line again mistakenly and shook my head to get focused. Then I read the same line once again. Only then I realized that the lines are on repeat.
Ay yo is this my grandma you’re talking about?
typical boomer. just tell her to leave if you are not living in her property. esto situation ma fixing thing is hard. you ask her to leave and everyone will blame the family for not looking after old mother.
Damn, looking at these comments I am blessed to have my loving grandma. Both from my moms side and fathers side. They are both supportive and always wants to see things grow between my parents.
My Grandmother is worse to be even called a woman , doesn’t care about grandfather and say bad things about my mother she is only scared of me among all grandsons and all three of her sons died including my father. i used to get angry that whatever she said about my mom now i realize that nature she developed came from her background once controlling all the family and money like typical movie sasu when buharis got the controll she moved back to another place with grandfather beacause daily feud with my father and thulo babas . Her mental health and authotarian style is the reason she doesn’t get along with anyone in the neighbours and family. I thought i would take her to phyciatrist but that tolerance level of mine has been passed and now i simply don’t care about her.
My friend has the same issue , his grandfather causes hella big problems in the family , because of his lies , his sons did a big fight with each other once and one even ended up in hospital , his grandmother long ago divorced him after getting enough of his nonsense .
tldr but this is typical granny
pathaideu oldage homes ma
She bullies her buhari because she was also bullied by her sasu aama in the past. Toxic cycle ho yo.
No offence but your grandma is a devil in human form, this sounds like a movie didn’t know this happens in real in Nepalese community
Is this issue happening every where or what 😂
I have same issue in my family too
Chadai Swarga basi huney symptoms ho.
Testai huncha gau ka Buda budi haru. Same yeta. Koi pauna Ayo ki yo vayena tyo vayena bhanihalchan. It’s always dad ko budi (mom)Lai naramro banaune.
This is my grandmother except mero chai le ghar vitra haina ghar bahira kura katxa
Hang in there lil bro, this too shall pass
~~And so will she~~
Same bro same. Ajhaa we have maid who comes morning ma to clean k. She complains to her and neighbor ko aunty about us and how we have been mean to her. She cries ajha Infront of them. Honestly I can’t wait for her to just yk
Get her a mobile phone and let her watch those Facebook ma vako patrakar. My grandma also used to do kichkich. Now, she is invested in those news all day long. Sure, sometimes she comes out to share her findings, but it’s far better than 24 7 kick kick.
Grandmother hating their own granddaughter. I have seen this issue many times. My guess you are only girl child of your parents. This is serious mental problem with older women who think girl child will bring dishonor to their family. There is no solution to this. Only time and patience will solve it. Be strong.
Lol.. Mero grandmother is at least 10 times more disgusting than her… ( sabai lai aafnu problem thulo lagxa and you might think I am biased on this but every person of my tole agrees this)
My great grandma who died 15 years ago marne bela ma ni she didn’t want to see her face because of her pratarna… My great grandma was my favorite person even she was the nicest person ( she had donated lands for moth mandir and even hamro dharmasala was build by her). We used to be rich and even my grandfather inherented 4th of the wealth from my great grand parents ( he had 3 brothers) we were still dheari rich but when 13 years ago my grandfather passed away purai dhan sampati ko binash garin.. Ak generation ma kaiyun generation le arjeko dhann sab khata..Literally ahile ghar bahek jagga ko naam pahila ko 10 percent matra hola…. She even gave away a big portion of our jagga to my fufus which they sold away to a guy jo sanga hamro jhagda parxa.. Mero grandmother kai karan both of my fufuja haru become nikkama and kamayeraw khadainan because she made them addict by giving money every month to them aba yesari nai paisa aaye kina kamunu.. Mero kancha ba was becoming the same my kaki really saved him. Even mero hajur ama kai karan mero aama raw kaki ko jhagda ni huna thaleko thiyo.. But both of them realised who was making them fight…….
Yo budhi vanda kahile kahi aafnai baau mathi ris lagxa.. Like I really don’t know why he keeps tolerating this all.. Even vanda kheri ni he agrees all this tara pheri last ma k garne ama hunuhunxa malai janma deko raixan aama lai kasari xadne.. My kanchaba is the same andha bhakt but Ali less.. Khai mero baulai le kina yo budhi ko andh bhakti garxan.. Every chad baad jhagda hunxa because of her.. Like she makes people fight.. Ani uskai galti vayeni mero buba kuderaw janu hunxa manauna this has become the norm every festival…. When my kancha ba said mero ansa de basdina yeta.. He literally had to do a court case on her…. Paxi back vaye.. May be because he is too an andh bhakt and also wants part from her property..
Now she is sick.. But none of my fufus do any herchar they just come here visit her and ghar lagxan.. Mero grandfather ko sarkari job ko pension sab inhi haru lai nai batdin xe…. Kasai ko maran ko kamana garnu hunna but I really hopes she dies away quick taki we could live in peace..
Nothing compared to mine she died on 2072 and i always pray so she wont rest in peace.
She had kirana pasal, hamrai ghar ma, dad le kholdeko and i swear hajmola ni kinera khanthim mom and me cause dad was abroad. There are lots of disgusting things she said and did to us.
Most disgusting thing she ploted against my mom was, mom daura lina janu vako bela ma she hid rat poison on kitchen and called her eldest son saying; malai dine vaat ma ali ali garera yo haldera didiraixe(bruh) And that mf advertised it among 2brothers and 5 sisters. We knew that only after she died.
One day you will be granny too. Instead of complaining about her here on Reddit, It would be better if you talk to her straightforwardly and put your problems there and try to find a solution.
Further, before your mother was there for your father, she was who gave birth to your father, looked after him and so that he had settled in place B .
Haha, it seems its common for old generation who are used to being boss in the house. Its quite hard for them to change their behaviour. Also, fupus fill their ears with so many things. Whatever damage they have done is done, you just accept it and think positive.
Cyanide in milk tea is an option?
I know respecting elders is important but I would beat the crap out of that person idc
I am.very sad to know what people think about their grandparents especially in comment. At least show some respect to them , old age ma loneliness le garda yesto problem hunxa; it’s common . Adjusting with new generation is difficult for old aged people ( you will know when you will be old). And treating them badly or ignoring them is not solution. This is all because of loneliness. She don’t spend money because she may think to save that for her funeral . Going to tirtha ( religious place tin dham ) , not ignoring her, can make some thing better.
Why do you hate your fupus?
Every grans is somewhat like that. Envious of their daughter in laws and projecting their perspective without any reason other than being the oldest in the household. There is nothing you can do sadly other than wait for her to leave. I’d minimize my contact with her and stop doing what triggers her in front of her. Avoidance is the key here imo.
Reading this has made me realise more that my grandma is way more loving and caring ( i always knew she is a gem).