I am 18(F) just passed my 12 exam not good gpa eldest child in my family all my friends went to ktm for entrance preparation where as I was still at my hometown had fight with my parents for not sending me KTM. Always been a average student . My father always say that he supports me. Today I eavesdropper him talk to one of my relative in phone “bachelor padauda padaudai biya gardine”
They have no plans on sending me to KTM for further studies. They even make joke “tero nam niskiyo bhane ta malai heart attack aauxa” funny right? And also my small brother who is 6 years smaller than me makes fun of my failure ( I know he is small) he rank in top 3 in his class which I never did. He rank 1 in his first terminal examination and I was compared to him “kai sik bhai sanga “.Plus a relative of mine even brought a marriage proposal for me kta Canada ma xa hare What did she thought k?( She have two daughter (nakali haru) 27 and 25 ) I am just 18 a teenager right? Marriage is a big responsibility and most hurting things is my parents tried to convince me! Bhai lai paxi sajilo hunxa re but I didn’t !Ghari Ghari ta ma kta bhayera janmeko bhai aali things would change jasto pani lagxa
Natra dai/didi bhako bhai maile yo sab dekhnu pardainathiyo hola
( Just crying in my room with darkness)
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I’ve been there. Throw a tantrum if needed, girl.maile ni tei garya ho i always wanted to learn fine art, tara, SEE ko grade le garda my parents decided to enroll me to a nearby college ra business pardnupqrya thyo. When i actually started throwing tantrums like not eating, staying in my room all the rime.(bela bela ma thapad ni khaiyo) mom le bihe ki kura ni gare and i was also 18 at that time. Tara j gare pani j bhane pani antim malai j chaiyeko thyo i got it. I sound like a spoiled ungrateful brat, i know that. Tara at some level what i did was right kina ki now im so good at Art, i earn enough for my monthly expenses, food, skincare bla bla.
Anyway what im trying to say is timi bhakhar 18 chau u still have soooo much to live. Aile nai bihe gardinu bhayo bhane you will regret your whole life. Sakincha bhane baru hiddeu ghar bata stay at your relatives jo chai timi sanga close hununcha, who can persuade your parents to not marry you off. Sounds like a bad idea but trust me aile jati gali khaye ni jati kutai khayeni timilai pachi maile j gare tyo ramro gare jastai huncha.
You wont have to waste your teenage life as a wife, taking care of a baby. Yo bhanda ta afule jiddi garekai ramro.
Everytime someone comes by saying euta kta ko kura ako xa Canada ko pr xa re, Green card wala ho my blood starts to boil.
Kura pani yesari garxan ki Canadian wa American hunu uniheruko main personality trait ho.
Aile bihe gardina vanda ni yesto ramro manxe ko auda ni nagarne, kasto ghamandi are kya.
Lagxa ki idesh ma basne bittikai uniharu manxe haina vagwan hun kya.
Agi varkhar khana khada euta aunty ko phone ako thiyo. America ma basne manxe ko kura ako xa are. Aba ko ek mahina paxi Nepal aune are ani bihe garne are. Maile aile ma padhdei xu vanera manina. Ani aunty ko jawaf cahi America ma ni college xainan ra. Utei gayera padhnu ni are.
Tetro mehenat garera entrance deko. Yetro barsa invest gareko. Haddi ghotera padheko sabei ago laidinu are maile. Reason: uniharuko xora ko bihe garne umer vayo are. Ris matra uthxa hau. Tyo aile samma nadekheko manxe sanga bihe garna maile aja samma gareko mehenat dustbin ma fyalnu re. Chinnu na jannu ghacheti mannu.🙄
Lol marriage at 18 you will just be ruining your life, go abroad thats the best case your fam seems toxic well so is mine, Your brother is prolly just being a child fighting for your parents attention.
I don’t understand why this is so common among young girls like you. I have a friend who went through exactly the same situation as you are. She almost got married with some foreign nepali guy. She came to ktm one of her cousin brother helped her to find a room and admit her in a college. Things were really tough for her at that time and I sometimes helped her pay rent and other expense when her brother couldn’t. After few months she got a job as a receptionist in one consultancy office. She’s still there and makes a good earning. She began to pays her own rent, college fees and any other expenses. After 2 years her parents finally came to KTM to see her and they were surprised by her progress. She became an independent strong Nepali women because of her circumstances. Aile she is 23 and has a loving boyfriend who is also earning good money and she’s likely to get married this year. Her family now respect her.
This could be the same to you. Use all the hate you feel to fuel your journey. Don’t hate your parents and fight with them but don’t resist any insult. Things will be good. Just ramro sanga padha, become creative and definitely improve you social skill and you will find good friends, job, and sab thik hunxa. There is high chance that your parents will be convinced and actually support you.
🙂i have known, certain someone gone the path , just like you’ve ! Ahh,those toxic ximekis n natedars ! It’s not your parents . it’s society that’s manipulating ur parents !
Imagine garerai very infuriating. Balla ta 12 pass vako xa bihey garauna khojxa. All i can say is try having an open conv. with them ekdam strict vayera boundary rakhera (high expectation navayeni at least your pov bujauna khojnu) but yk nepali parents have tendency to act like trash. Ali bujhauna khojyo ki thulo lai sikauna khojxa vanne or gaslight garna khojne. But if ekdam force le bihey ko proposals lyaune accept garna lagaune garyo vaney its better to contact some orgs that take care of these cases. Jati force garey ni padhai chai naxodnu year gap linai pareni continue chai garnus. Bhai ko lagi vandai yeti ko sacrifice garnu doesn’t feel right (blatant discrimination vairako xa k). Bhai le ni thulo vayexi bujhdai janxa hola but it’s okay to be selfish while making some decisions.
Also, KTM kina aauna mann vako ni bujey.
Hope everything works well and you can be happier.
Kinda sorry aru ko similar comment vayo hola but even as a guy khatrai rees uthna thalyo padhera so console vaye ni garna mann vayo. (teti effective vayena hola T T )
Why do you want to go Kathmandu? What do you want to study?
> She have two daughter (nakali haru) 27 and 25 ) I am just 18 a teenager right?
Big yes.
> Bhai lai paxi sajilo hunxa re
I hate this!
I am the youngest one in my family and i have two sisters before me(both sre the most talented mfs i have ever seen) and until i grow of fully both of them will have settled and i will have a simple and easy life soo i can’t say i know how you feel.
But i can say this much that you just have to work hard and say fuck U to those things you hear… you are gonna complete you bachelor anyhow and not marry anyone and straight get the fuck out of this country. Bidesh jana paisa pugena vane or bihey garera nai janu parcha vannu vayo vane parents le just marry him and take a divorce after getting to the foreign country. Thats all thw ideas i could offer.
I hope you find your peace somewhere or in someone and hey don’t get depressed about it cause try to live your life to your fullest and not being sad. So please don’t cry and cheer up.
as a 22(M), I feel what you are saying.
I am thinking of going to Scandinavian Country soon, and settle there in a cow farm. We could build a new stable future together, with no gharelu jimbewari and shit.
I will take care of the farm. You take care of the house.
Are you down?
___
Serious:
Nepalese parents are the scum. They really do discriminate against son and daughter. Plus, timley bihey garera xori payeu vaney ni yatana dina sakxan Nepal/India ma. Mahila ley ni xori pako naruchaune ni hunxan. This socienty is really sick men.
I really hope you make use of whatever limited opportunity you have, and escape the matrix. The matrix as in social barriers that stop you from achieving what you want.
Case haldeu yetii chado bihe garnu is ridiculous, parents le timro barema sochnu parcha ni yrr kei garchu vanera basesi parents le support garnu parcha ni or maybe try to convince you’re parents cuz 18 vaneko kalikai time ho timro freedom and all start ni va chaina,try to convince mata tei vanchu roedeuu.
50% people are below average by statistics. Being average is not necessarily a bad thing. Dont listen to your parents, looks like they want to get ‘rid’ of you. Ask for guidance from your seniors/ teacher/Friends or whoever you can get. Be realistic of your expectation from your efforts but never let others downplay what and who you are. You are not a tool to help your family. You do you. Good luck
well thats life, i would be happy to marry a woman in canada.
one woman’s iron is another man’s gold
Bro that’s fucked up .Try having an open conversation with your parents threaten them with police lai bhandinxu or sucide garera marxu bihe garnu bhanda ta if need be. If they won’t hear you out try seeking out help from some other trusted family member a cousin , uncle , mama. If you really wanna come to kathmandu and prepare for your studies try seeking out improvements first learn new skill ek barsa back linnu cha bhani ni liu tara padhne para le . Don’t compare your grade with brother baccha bela ko padhai obviously ramro hunxa paxi gayera kasto hunxa hamlai ni thaxa .
Is this your first time? Sorry for being harsh, but I guess that’s how the world works. Simply ask yourself why you couldn’t be in the top three or become above average (according to the post) and be honest with yourself.
Work on yourself instead than whining on Reddit . I realize I seem like a jerk here, but Truth, as they say, is always bitter. Many users of this sub must be drooling rn after reading the 18F in your post, and they will attempt to console you by saying oh it’s not your fault and shits, but what can we expect from a sub full of individuals who beg for FWB partners all over the place?
Have a nice night.
Bihe baari 20 paari bhanxa ta Nepal government le nai kaha 18 mai bihe garne,Baal bibhaha hola ni yo ta
Yes.. you are only 18. Don’t park that rebellious part of yours yet.
Go abroad girlie
Hi im 22 F. Married at 18. Have two children. Life aint that bad.
your parents have no right to marry you off rn , rebel if you have to prove them wrong , ramro padha ani j ma padhna man lagya xa tei padha your parents have legal obligation to financially support your studies . there is no need to cry for your parents mistake. You be strong sis
Have your head up baini!
Best way is to tell parents what you want make it very very clear .Pick a bachelors course , Work on yourself,while you will be studying bachelors develop some skills and try and find some earning source. Your parents will leave your back once they learn you are on your path to independence + That will give you confidence and a sense of self worth.
And Parents only want to marry away their girl early if they see no hope for her . Work hard to give them that hope of your individual progress
This is you war. I won’t suggest you to fight with your family, elope somewhere or else. Communicate well with them. Btw Law won’t allow you to marry before 21.
You’re just 18. It’s just a starting of a hard time. From how you talk and all I make an assumption that your parents are sensible enough to not get you married this soon, like bachelor garda gardai ni you’ll be like 20-21, aailhe ko time ma that’s a really young age to marry. Instead of marrying a Canada bhako guy, what if you go to Canada.
Make opportunities off of such things. And KTM nai Jana parcha bhanni ni chaina. Not Kathmandu holds all the facilities or anything. You can study as near to your house.
And you’re your boss. You’re your decision maker. None can force you to have take such decisions. Give time to yourself. And comparison is the destroyer of self motivation. Sabai different huncha you’re you, your friends are them and your brother is he. So don’t compare yourself to anyone.
Your parents already see you as a failure. Poor grades = dumb, gari khana na sakney, lato. But still they want you to have quality life hence the marriage proposal pr wala sanga. If you aren’t that great in studies learn some vocational skills that you like which could land you a job and make you independent. Timilai sansar ma kasailay support wah saath na diye pani eklai chattan jasto ubina saknu paro. 25 barsha samma yo sab garnu ani 26,27 tira bihey ko barey ma.
This is wild for me to hear from a 18(M) perspective. I am also a 12th passout just thinking about it boggles my mind.
>marriage proposal for me kta Canada ma xa
Nahhh this shit is wild for me hai. I’ve never expected any girl of my age will be getting marriage proposals. Someone please tell me this isn’t normal. I personally feel like you can talk it out with your parents or take legal action if this grows more serious.
Prove your parents wrong. Entrance ma naam nikaldeu.
Ktm is not the only option.
Also maybe think about earning on your own to sustain your dream.
Nahh that’s really messed-up. Is your farther or mother any of them educated? Bruhh this not paila ko jasto purano jamana. Cant believe some parents still have this mentality.
Say fuck you move on
Do it by your own for yourself sister
It’s not easy but u have to do
Their is no other option
Do it sister
>and also my small brother who is 6 years smaller than me makes fun of my failure
Remind him that, he is only good at his studies because of his male privilege. It’s not his hardwork alone that is making him get good marks. With that also he is at 3 not 1. And no he is not just a child. He learned to be bully, he certainly can learn to be nice person. And do whatever you can to get the fuck out of that house. After sometime you will start getting emotional blackmailing. And it will be hell. So get the fuck out of there.
I guess that Canada wala kta is a 40yo pedophile.
koi relative tesari aayo vane tharkaidine ho.. my sister did it to few then after they never tried bringing any more.. natra pahila mahina ma 1-2 ta lyaihalthye…
aba typical nepali parents lai ta ghurkyaune ra dhamkaune bahek aru kei chaldaina…
I hope you stay well.
Below 20 yrs of age marriage garyo vane illegal huncha. And….. Poor GPA is 100 % your fault. (unless you had to do house chores/works during exams) .
Make stronger yourself and be prepared to live independently.
Ktm padhna napathaye ni excel in what u r good study hard work hard n then show them results,kti Lai chai settled hos vanne sochle hola,tell them it’s illegal till 21 to marry u off n work hard 3 yrs show how good u can be at something,once they see u excel they surely won’t worry Abt marrying u off…p
Aafulai j man lagxa tei gara tara addictionma napara. Arule jati pressure diyeni man navako kura nagareko ramro.
Entrance preparation ko lagii ktm nai janu parxa vanne xaina yeti dherai khali Time vayeko bela gharma baserw aananda ley padhna sakinthyo aani baru Bachlore padhna lai ktm nai janey vaye Entrance ma name nikalna sakinthyo ni tw. Aakhir KTM gYerw eklai baserw sabai kam aafai garnu parney vaye paxi aafailai dukhka aani padhney time pani Ghar ma baserw padheko vanda kam hunxa. BUT timiley Ma padhna sakdaina ma average student matrw ho vanerw sochna chai xodna parxa.malai ni pahila testai lagthyo trw Jaba malai euta hard lagne subject ma exam vanda aagadi normally aaru bela vanda aali badhi padhey malai tyo subject nai sabai vanda easy lagyo tesailey sakdaina vanerw kailey naxodnu try garnu parxa paxi regret nahosh vanerw .
Aani aayo tyo Bachlore padhauda padhaudai Bihey gardine kura tyo chai timiley aafno pariwar ma jo sanga alik khulerw kura garna sakxau uha sanga kura garnu testo koi xaina vane aaba jasari hunxa khulerw aaffno parents sanga kura garnu Kinaki testo kura manma rakhirakhyo vane timilai mentally pressure parxa (MA YO KURA KINA VANDAI XU VANE MERO PANI AAFULAI CHITTA NABUJHEKO KURA AARU LAI NAVANI MANMAI RAKHNEY BAANI XA TESAILEY)timilai paxxi regret nahosh.
Last ma Yei Vanxu ki Reddit ma Jatti lekhe pani timiley Yo sab Chitta nabujeko kura Aafno Parents lai Direct navanda samma Timi lai nai mentally pressure parxa So jasari hunxa aat garerw Vana
AABA yetro thulo xori lai Buwa aama ley kutnu pitnu tw hudaina hola tesailey kei namaani jahile pani affulai Chitta Nabujheko kura Parents lai vanna Paxi gayerw Regret nahosh belai ma navaneko ma 😊
(Mailey 1 yrs Depression ko aausadhi chalaye but last ma aafulai Chitta nabujheko kura haru sabai Direct vanepaxi malai aaba kehi ko pressure xaina tesailey sabai kura khulerw bhana Reddit ma haina Pariwar lai )😁
If they are financially capable of letting you study in ktm then fight for it
mero situation yestai ho, 12 ko exam sakera ktm janu mann theyo for entrance prep ( aru sab sathi gako dhekera). mumi le jana dinu vayena so i stayed home and was angry. paxi +2 ma 4 ota subs ma NG aayo. Now ik why she didn’t let me go to ktm
that’s just sad, parents in Nepal are still not as understanding as they should be. hope you get the best of whatever you want and your parents don’t spoil your life in any way
Noice