As the title says, literally everyone tells me Im “sojho” and some relatives tell me I need to be more “batho and chalak”. At this grown age of mine (25) I dont know how I can do that. How does one even become “batho”? I get compared to my “batho” cousins alot and it’s so annoying!
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Ma herda sojho dekhinchu, tara manxe baatho chu.
Timi ni testei po lagyo malai, haha.
In nepali society, if you are a person who has some level of introversion and quietness (traits correlated with high IQ) you are “sojho”.(they basically mean dumb)
And if you are loud, obnoxious , deceiving and pretentious (traits correlated with low IQ) you are “batho”.
Don’t worry about what they think, if they think you are sojho then let them think that. Live authentically, most people are other people their thoughts are someone else’s opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation.
Oh the irony
From experience i am saying be the sojho. As the saying goes, yeda banera peda khau.
I was called Sojho and a good boy my whole life. I quietly label those who call me Sojhi as “Dumb” for they have no idea behind their thought process that leads to call someone “Sojho”.
I am semi-introvert. I am quite in some social situations for reasons. Either I don’t find the topic interesting and never bother to comment, or when people get into serious nonstop backbiting.
I turn into Extrovert mode in the right situation and with right person.
I find there is nothing wrong with being Sojho. Neither Sojho person Dumb as thought by others.
Sojho in my experience means like that they think you’re naive or socially inexperienced . Like you would get sucked up in a scam or MLM. Or you would get the wrong order and not speak up for yourself. Or not fight back something that doesn’t agree with you. Batho is more like clever not smart. You can be book smart but not be clever. Or socially aware like they can read the room and adjust stuff for people. Or resourceful like you can do much with what you have/given rather than be stuck.
You can be more “batho” at your age by being more socially aware. Let’s say you’re an introvert and in a fam party or something. You need to talk a little and keep some sort of connection regardless of introvert you are. Like society don’t run by itself. You can be more batho by more resourceful like learning a new useful skill or hobby. You can be Batho by connecting the missing dots for people or explaining things to them clearly
By “batho” people usually mean malignantly selfish narcissistic. These people don’t really care about others in a micro level as much as a scared little bitch, “sojho” people do who feign humility and care to sit on the safer end of the conversation.
In Nepalese society, If you are extroverted and talkative you are batho otherwise you are ‘lato’. Even I used to hear that a lot but not anymore. Then I used to give only one answer to them “why do you care? Mero jindagi tapaile chalaidinu bhako cha ra?”
I don’t understand the concept of “batho” “Sojho” in our society . Malai sabai le batho bhancha maybe because ma alli Bolne khalko chu while mero cousins haru alli reserved , dherai na Bolne , dherai so chera Bolne khalko ekdam cunning afno faida chaina bhane involve nai nahaune . In contrast ma alli easy going . Tara uni haru sojho Chan re ma chahi batho ma ganinchu. Yo batho sajho ko tag dida chitta bujdaina.
They would probably call a charming serial killer a sojo as well.
Sojho ra batho bhanne ni hunxa ra?
Class chalira bela a friend of mine once called me sojho because I kept the wrapper of the chewing gum in my pocket rather than throwing away desk ko tala.
It’s just a people’s perspective jasto lagxa, for the same act someone calls you sojho while some will call you batho.
You don’t have to prove to anyone else listen from one ear and let it pass from another. Be the version of you that you want to be.
Sojho hunu parcha ra sojo nae raha, just learn to say No when you don’t feel like it and communicate when you feel like it.
Ask for few thousand as loan and never pay back. All of a sudden you will be most batho person they will encounter.
Batho in Nepali society means being a scammer and two faced cheat honestly. Doing corruption is considered batho. It does not mean clever but conniving.
Why do you care what other people say? You should know who you are. Sometimes people also call me sojho, they say I should get clever girl as my wife lol
But I know who I am. And I just laugh it off.
I think they say this because you speak less. Your cousins express themselves a lot and are more vocal.
There might be some aspects where you are naive but since you are talking about this you know you are not that “sojho” they are referring
Well my take in this is that I think almost everyone acts different around friends, family and colleagues , in one group they call me sojho but in the other group they see me different, because I choose what side of me that people get to see and I act accordingly depending on who I am with , my opinion would be to just be who you are and not think about what others say
khas ma batho hunu bhaneko chai k ho maile pani aaile samma bujna sakeko xuina.
Sojho in my experience is literally an introvert that’s it
Leverage it. People think same of me. I can do all kinds of shit and get away with it. People still think I’m sojho.
I don’t get what this term “sojho” even means. I see the people being called batho (because they’re outgoing and social) making the dumbest decisions in life. On the other hand, if there’s someone with good judgement, but doesn’t express much and is well behaved they’re called sojho. I’ve had a distant relative call me sojho within the first two minutes of the meeting when we barely even had any conversation. On the other hand, I’ve had people call me batho too because of some things that I said and vice versa. So, maybe it’s just people’s perception of you, it doesn’t really matter.
batho mean manipulative, capable of deceit and doing everything necessary for sake of it. hah!
Malai ni tyastai bhanchha!
specially yetai nepalmai basera hola.
sab cousins bahira
yastai ho bro yastai ho
I have been there brother. Dont listen to those shits. Just focus on yourself. Kaam garera kasari kamaaune vanera sochnu.
This troubled me a lot in my youger days. But fuck it, do whatever you enjoy, have interest on and so on. Just make sure you have some sort of skill and can earn. Other than that its all a matter of perception depending on the people you interact with. I maybe batho when it comes to IT, design, music, media knowledge, etc while sojho at politics, societal occurances and all.
If you feel like its totally hindering you, isolate the sibject matters you want to feel “batho” about and learn. With enough applicabel knowledge you’ll be batho in those. Have patience, learn, apply and its best to not fuss about these sort of matters in my opinion.
Batho in nepal = aru lai jhukkaune thugne and hawa opinion dine every kura ma
Better to be lato than to be deceitful
Do this.
Go out. Come home late. Work out. Treat them with respect. Learn a skill. Go out on the evening with friends. Dont depend on anyone, wherever you go don’t stay till it gets boring. Leave before the conversation dies. Watch latest movies, gives you something to talk about. See current market, politics and trends, makes you relatable. Read 10 pages before you sleep, and meditate in the morning.
I got called sojho too many times, i got tired of hearing that. Not that they call me syal these days, don’t ever be cunning, but I don’t get called sojho because i prioritize myself and my parents when things come.
Have a productive time man, things will get good. Want to see you get better in the next 6 months
its okay to be sojho. whats the fault in that
Bang your cousin and get her pregnant
Skill issue
Don’t try to change yourself. You are what you are. If everybody starts becoming a so-called batho, then there will be a new standard of batho. Moreover, every individual is different., and this defines the uniqueness in each of us. Remember, the world has achieved nothing good because of someone being batho. Being a batho has only created corrupt politicians, thieves, hooligans, human traffickers. However, being wise is different, and is not well realized by the society in Nepal.
Try to be wise, not Batho.
Don’t succumb to the pressure. Remain sojho your entire life.
1.I also get this comment a lot.
2.I don’t get what are the characteristics and criteria to be sojho and what criteria should i cross to be batho?
This comment might slip through but if you’re reading this, try to do self-reflection. Do you get called sojhi just because you don’t speak much or there is more to it? Sometimes there are problems within but the way it is conveyed to you creates the wrong meaning and your ego takes the lead to create the false assumptions.
It is indeed irritating to hear that and people take you so lightly all the time. Since you haven’t wrote much about your personality, most people can only presume you to be introverted. While there is nothing wrong being introverted, some conditions like social anxiety and low self-esteem will take a toll in your mental state later in life. Give it a peaceful thought and read some books related to health, mind, and body. Cheers.
Sojo = doesn’t speak much.
Bato = speaks very frankly.
Me too and I think ma herda pani ekdamai soho dekuinxu tara only I know how evil I am in my thoughts
If you are well behaved,well mannered, speak only when required, talk slowly and quietly , if you don’t engage in illusions like drug and sex you are labelled as sojho
Focus on yourself and improve yourself day by day eventually when you become best version of yourself you can easily ignore these bullshit comments from your relatives because they can’t hurt and manipulate you.
Best of luck
Look weak when you are strong.
Sun Zu
Do u know how to say no to people ,then u r literally sojho like me
In my perceived experience yes those who can divert talks , knows to say no , manipulate others, make others listen while talking, …
Maybe you generally trust people quite easily OR You are either Wiser than most people in our society without the spotlight, which get wrongly termed as Sojo instead of Bhaladmi.
My relatives also uaed to call me sojho 2-3 years back and I borrowed money from them and I am avoiding anf deceiving them in several ways..Now I am on the list ofmost batho person they known yet…you can use it too wisely 😂
Sojho in Nepali is a person who doesn’t talk. For them a person who spouts their mouth even if they are dumb as a rock is batho. I’m one of the so called sojho. Stop thinking about them and you do you.
Don’t try to change yourself. You are what you are. If everybody starts becoming a so-called batho, then there will be a new standard of batho. Moreover, every individual is different., and this defines the uniqueness in each of us. Remember, the world has achieved nothing good because of someone being batho. Being a batho has only created corrupt politicians, thieves, hooligans, human traffickers. However, being wise is different, and is not well realized by the society in Nepal.
Try to be wise, not Batho.
They say it like you’re changing batteries from a remote. Batho afno lagi huney ho arulai dekhauna haina.
Ohhhh this is what i go through everyday literally