My mom has always been very dominating but at the same time she has a huge victim mentality. For example when we are talking about something, she has to talk all the time and we can only say ‘ho ho thik ho’ anything more than that, she’ll call me ‘dominating’. If her opinion is 1, anyone else that says 0.9 or 1.1 hates her and is trying to dominate her. She acts like she knows everything and has opinion about everything and only her opinion is right.
Because of this her friends don’t talk to her much anymore. They don’t include her in the group. If everyone is having lunch together, they won’t invite her. Her cousins maintain distance. Me and her don’t have good relationship. She fights with dad all the time. She nonstop says shitty things about you to you. Like she constantly talks about how fat, ugly, loser I am. It is the same with brother and dad. And if you have had too much and get angry, she is the victim.
She intentionally says things that will make two person dislike each other. Like talking shit about me to brother and brother to me. Literally today she was talking to her sister and she said how I make brother do all the house chores and he has been cleaning the house everyday. But brother and I were in the same room and brother said he hasn’t cleaned(mopped) the house in a month. There was nothing we could do except laugh.
We are worried about how she will adjust when both brother and I go abroad? She will be totally alone? What will happen when brother gets married? What will we do when she gets older and we have to take care of her?
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One of the great crisis of this age is the dilemma of the modern housewife. They have nothing to do, most of them are educated but just for the sake of it hence they can understand the world but cannot contribute anything meaningful. All the household chores are done by a maid or atleast it has become less of a burden due to modern appliances. All they do is sit and home and become agitated. This agitation spills onto others as they bully other people and create a toxic environment. Their whole lives they have been told to find value in family life and they did that but times have changed now and what was supposed to feel like being on the top of the world now feels like they have nothing
RemindMe! 2 days
If that’s a medical condition then I hope she gets well soon. But if she is doing all this knowingly and intentionally then she sounds like a Karen to me according to your description.
Tbh if she’s alone that’s her fault and no one else’s.
Narcissist?
If it’s a mental condition then you guys need to look further into what you can do but I think (most probably) she’s a narcassist. For the later case, you guys need to do an intervention and only she can help herself.
Dayum that sounds like MY mom. I grew up with her telling me how ugly, fat and dark I am. I love her very much but I think that she won’t change at this point, verbal abuse is kinda common in South Asian culture. I’d suggest you don’t pay much attention to her and take care of YOUR mental health. Also, if she could start a new hobby, maybe that would help. My mom started singing and using starmaker so the verbal abuse has reduced significantly. All the best!